How ironic that in yesterday's post, I commented on the slowness of the news when, in fact, the news was not slow at all! On the contrary, it was yesterday that the story broke that sizzling celebrity duo Jake Gyllenhaal and Taylor Swift - whose whirlwind romance lasted somewhere between eight weeks and never - had reportedly split.
I did not know this because I honestly didn't check my Jake news before I put up that post. I just made the assumption that nothing was going on because I was being lazy. Truly, the odds are just not with the average Jake blogger on a day to day basis when it comes to things of alleged interest to report on... So I missed this one. I admit it. And me? Autocompleting on Google? Arguably more unexpected than this development in Jake's love life. Scratch that. Definitely more unexpected. Who would have ever thought my MySpace blog would rank above Jake Watch in terms of search options???????
Anyway. I spent a lot of time during Jake and Taylor's short-lived romance ruthlessly mocking it and making the kinds of scathing comments that only I can get away with. I thought about writing a relationship retrospective today so we could take a look back at the ups (apple-picking) and the downs (US Weekly, helicopters) but...who the hell cares? It was dumb from start to finish, it was boring from start to finish, and it did nothing but make you guys fight with each other from start to finish. And now, regardless of which side of the fence you were on before, it's bequeathed upon us a communal embarrassment that it's over so quickly.
On Jake Watch, we had a very strict no tolerance rule when it came to gossip, and I could count on one hand the number of posts we wrote that even indirectly referred to Jake's private life. Part of that was because we were trying to do the right thing...but part of it was because we knew that talking about his personal business usually led to strong and not-always-healthy emotional responses from his fans.
But this blog is not Jake Watch. And the longer I'm around, the less concerned I am about the reactions of others and the more interested I am in writing about what I want to write about. That's why I wrote about these two to begin with.
What I'm realizing as I sit here, though, is that I never actually cared. They were just something to talk about. That's all. Most of the time (as hinted at above) there isn't anything to talk about, and so I talked about them because it was a subject I was capable of expanding upon. But now that we don't have them anymore, we'll go back to trying to find interest in things that aren't interesting. In tired interviews, in relentlessly mundane paparazzi pictures, in endless (and groundless) speculation about new movies and new women. It's exhausting me just thinking about it.
In the very near future, I'm going to start a new blog. I'm by no means abandoning this one, but I am going to be more realistic about it. Half of you hate that I don't write more about Jake and the other half only tolerate my current subject matter because you're too nice to tell me you'd rather read about something else. And all I know is that when I got the news of this breakup, I felt obligated to write about it. But I really didn't want to. And look at that, I (kind of) didn't.
So (details and further explanation to follow) I'm moving on to the next thing. Just like Jake and Taylor did, apparently sometime last month...
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